No Grounds for Divorce
July 4th, 2009 by Walter L. Bell, Ph.D.

My Lovely and Interesting Wife

Every person has interesting characteristics that you only learn about as you live with them over the years. My wife grew up in the South, as did my mother, so I understand the ways of looking at the world, particularly the emphasis on good manners, how to act in a social setting, and heaven forbid that any guest would come to your home and go away hungry.

I learned shortly after we got married that she is definitely not a morning person. I almost always am fully awake unless I have stayed up too late, or have had a particularly busy schedule from some task I had to complete. My wife does not like to talk in the morning, other than to say hello. She is a great cook. If she ever cooked something I didn’t like, I would never say a word because I don’t cook unless it is something very simple. My wife can cook any kind of ethnic dish without a problem. For example, I like hot and sour soup that you get in a Chinese restaurant. The problem is that some Chinese restaurants make very bad hot and sour soup, so I asked my wife to make some. We experimented with it, and I kept tasting it until she got is exactly to my liking. Breakfast is another situation altogether. She makes her own, and I make mine. Until she is fully awake, she cannot be trusted. That is the subject of this brief article.

One morning while we were traveling in our RV, my wife made coffee. Ordinarily she can perform this morning task without any problem. The coffee she made on the morning in question tasted great. I would not have known that anything was different until she started to clean the coffee maker and discovered that the filter had no grounds in it. It was slightly discolored, but that was all. We discussed what steps she had taken when she made the coffee. The only way you can have a cup of coffee without grounds is to start with cold water and instant coffee and heat in the microwave or pouring boiling water over instant coffee. However, neither way of making coffee with instant coffee yields a coffee that tastes like brewed coffee in a coffee maker. But, as my wife, in her usual zombie state when she first gets out of bed, discovered, instant coffee tastes exactly like regular brewed coffee made from ground coffee in a coffee maker.

So, if your wife makes an important discovery, even if by accident, forgive her. After all, very few people know that you can make coffee in a coffee maker with instant coffee. In fact I looked up information on instant coffee, and it is made from premium coffee beans. So if your wife ever makes a similar discovery remember it is no grounds for divorce.

Posted in Political and Historic Events, Technical and Scientific Discoveries, Uncategorized

Tags: Zombies in the Kitchen


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